Here are four warning signs of a toxic friendship.
If you have a friend who it seems needs you for almost everything, then you might have a toxic friend who is using you for their own self-interests. We all need friends, but when friends start to drain us of our time, energies, and resources, you might want to step back and take a close look at how one-way this relationship is. If you’re constantly giving, but never receiving, then you might have a user for a friend.
It’s so easy to judge others because it seems it’s a lot easier to see the faults of others while not seeing our own. I have a friend who has helped me become less judgmental about people. He tries to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and not judge them by appearances, but if you have a friend who is constantly judging others without ever seeing their own faults, you’ve got a toxic friendship and one that can rub off on you and too can become judgmental. We tend to become like those we’re around, so be careful when your friend is judging people way too often.
Gossip is one of the most destructive things we as human beings do, but gossiping about others is destructive, divisive, and destroys people’s good names and reputations. So what if it’s true! If it hurts others, true or not, we have no business talking about people behind their backs, and think about this, if your friend gossips about others, you can bet they gossip about you too. Be careful about making a gossip your friend because you can get dragged into the gossip too and become part of the problem.
Who wants to be around someone who always thinks the worst of people and expects the worst of circumstances? Not too many people want to be around someone who is so pessimistic that they can say few things good to anyone or about anyone. The Pessimist sees the glass as half empty where we might see it as half full, but we should be thankful that we even have a glass in the first place. Count your blessings, be thankful to God, but you’ll have a harder time with that when your friend is a pessimist.
If you have a friend who is constantly using you or they are judging everyone that they see or know, and if they continually gossip about others, but are also the world’s greatest pessimist, you might have a toxic friendship. It’s either time to sit down and talk with your friend about this or distance yourself from your friend lest you become like they are.
May God richly bless you,
Pastor Jack Wellman
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