Moms, ask yourself these self-examining questions and see if they are worth thinking about. Maybe you could add one yourself.
My Prayer Quotient
Just as I stated as a self-diagnostic tool for the Christian dad to ask himself, I will also put this one first because praying for our children might be the single, greatest thing we could ever do as a mother or a father. Mom’s, how much time do you spend praying for your children? Is it every day? Is it more than once a day? There may be nothing more important that a parent could do than pray for their children.
Respecting their Day
Moms, if you show respect for their dad, then you model for them how they are to respect their own dad and others in society. It is true; more is caught than taught. It will be harder for your children to respect their dad and you too, if you don’t show your children’s father…your husband, respect.
Am I Available?
Moms have such an enormously busy scheduled that it’s easy to have other things squeezed out like time to sit and listen to your children or to ask them about their day and how things are going at school or with their friends. It doesn’t matter if they only shrug their shoulders and say, “okay.” A question directed to your children still shows them that you care; whether they respond or not. Ask open ended questions that cannot be answered yes or no. In this way, they can more easily open up about things that are going on in their lives.
Am I a Safe Base?
Are your children hesitant to bring things up to you? Do they often try to hide mistakes, bad grades, or poor decisions? Maybe it’s because they don’t feel like you’re a “safe base” for them to come to and tell you about things that are going on in their lives. I always wanted my children to know that they could tell me anything and that my love is not conditioned or dependent on their behavior or poor choices. Are they afraid to tell you something because you might blow up and get angry at them? Are you a “safe base” mom where even when they’ve blown it, your children can come to you and confide in you?
Do I Play Favorites?
This can happen so easily. One of my two children hardly ever needed discipline but my oldest seemed to always be in trouble. Maybe I was favoring his younger sister. It is so easy to do. She was the “baby” of the family; she always got good grades and hardly ever got into trouble so it might be that I did in fact favor her more than my oldest so I apologized to him when I discovered this was so. Do you play favorites with your children? Remember that Jacob did with Joseph and Joseph’s brothers took it out on him.
May God richly bless you,
Pastor Jack Wellman
image source: CC BY SA Petras Gagilas
modifications: cropped, text added
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